Re: that story i wrote

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:47 pm

spinnythings wrote:ammy if you couldn't finish that story you'd never be able to sit through a Godard film cuz you'd be too busy complaining the audio was broken in "A Woman is a Woman"

butthurt deviantart user tier reply nerd

just because i think your story needs work doesn't mean i sit and bitch all day

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:48 pm

creamammy wrote:the parts that DO tell a lot have it all crammed together in a beefy paragraph or even in a couple sentences, leading to a phenomenon called "information overload" where your brain just starts to tune it all out

to be fair if this is for school it's likely going to be leaps and bounds beyond your classmates' work

that was the le point

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:48 pm

spinnythings wrote:gay thread

calm the fuck down

stop being buttmad because i'm trying to give you advice

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:49 pm

spinnythings wrote:
creamammy wrote:the parts that DO tell a lot have it all crammed together in a beefy paragraph or even in a couple sentences, leading to a phenomenon called "information overload" where your brain just starts to tune it all out

to be fair if this is for school it's likely going to be leaps and bounds beyond your classmates' work
that was the le point

and that information overload is why i stopped reading, because i started to think about if i should go into town to get some groceries while my eyes were still moving

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:50 pm

this is like when deviantart users go all FUCK U TROLL when you try to help them with their MS paint sonic OC '"``art``"'

idk where people got the idea that constructive criticism has to lick your feet and suck on your toes until they're sparkle-clean

your story doesn't suck but it defenitely needs work

by **LEADER OF THE FREE WORLD** Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:55 pm

creamammy wrote:this is like when deviantart users go all FUCK U TROLL when you try to help them with their MS paint sonic OC '"``art``"'

idk where people got the idea that constructive criticism has to lick your feet and suck on your toes until they're sparkle-clean

your story doesn't suck but it defenitely needs work

basically this is essentially perfect and if you WANTED to you could maybe imrpove it in this one meaningless area?

SHUT UP FIAL TROLL ITS PERFECT

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:03 pm

but the effect was supposed to be that she was just thinking about stuff...... its not supposed to be completely coherent.......

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:03 pm

spinnythings wrote:but the effect was supposed to be that she was just thinking about stuff...... its not supposed to be completely coherent.......

fine fine

just stop being a mad fag about it

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:04 pm

what you're suggesting is trash the whole thing and start over
like there's no other way to approach an edit of that magnitude

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:04 pm

hey spinny guess what

your story isn't completely perfect

i know i just shattered your whole world view but you'll recover

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:04 pm

spinnythings wrote:what you're suggesting is trash the whole thing and start over
like there's no other way to approach an edit of that magnitude

im not suggesting that at all

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:05 pm

i like constructive criticism cmon you guys tell me stuff about my art and i listen
this is art too in its own way
if you tell me to start all over then i get defensive its what i do

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:06 pm

creamammy wrote:
spinnythings wrote:what you're suggesting is trash the whole thing and start over
like there's no other way to approach an edit of that magnitude
im not suggesting that at all

removing all the crazy stuff would leave just a frame of a person walking to a shuttle and it lifting off and nothing else and on its own that cannot stand

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:06 pm

IM NOT TELLING YOU TO START OVER FAGORT

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:07 pm

spinnythings wrote:
creamammy wrote:
spinnythings wrote:what you're suggesting is trash the whole thing and start over
like there's no other way to approach an edit of that magnitude
im not suggesting that at all
removing all the crazy stuff would leave just a frame of a person walking to a shuttle and it lifting off and nothing else and on its own that cannot stand

no dumb fuck

i'm pointing out things in the story that you shouldn't do so that you don't make the same mistakes again in another story

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:08 pm

bah this character was supposed to be written third person

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:09 pm

you didnt even read it all you just stopped. thats just rude dude...

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:10 pm

spinnythings wrote:you didnt even read it all you just stopped. thats just rude dude...

where did i sign the contract that said i was obligated to like your story

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:10 pm

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:11 pm

you might be taken aback by this, but i'm a real human being capable of his own thoughts and opinions!

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:12 pm

fuck you

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:12 pm

you're pissing me off now

i stopped reading your story becasue of the information overload, so don't do it again

see? it's easy

by Guest Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:12 pm

douchebag

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:13 pm

mad as fuck i'm not even going to bother

crying little bitch tears becasue i has some gripes about how you write isn't going to redeem your story

by gay Fri Oct 25, 2013 7:15 pm

i literally gave you advice on how to write better and you respond by crying because i didn't read your whole story and then write my phd thesis paper examining it and all of its splendor

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