what do you think you know? IV

i literally have an entire book of dumb shit ive written over the years i will post it

cant wait

i'm glad you're so eager to share

i dont even care what am i gonna do with it?

proceeds to not post it

PART ONE

"I HATE REHAB"
Maybe you don't get the memo from me.
I HATE REHAB.
Detest it, loathe it, wish it never happened. I can't deny it helped me through my alcoholism, but it was so awful I almost wanted to stay an alcoholic. There's nothing good about it - not a thing. It's like a rock farm, nobody enjoys it, nothing is good, it's just pain, all day and all night. Pinkie would probably have just collapsed in pain if she had to deal with what I had to. I only got through it because of Dash and nothing else. Seriously, I only did it and only survived it because she cared. I doubt anyone else did. And you know, now that I think of it, I just want to say to you four, Twilight, Rarity, Pinkie & Flutter - I hate you. Thanks for nothing.

--Applejack, May 24th, 2012

i got a million of these

fuckin horse rehab

slamjamsk8r wrote:PART ONE

"I HATE REHAB"
Maybe you don't get the memo from me.
I HATE REHAB.
Detest it, loathe it, wish it never happened. I can't deny it helped me through my alcoholism, but it was so awful I almost wanted to stay an alcoholic. There's nothing good about it - not a thing. It's like a rock farm, nobody enjoys it, nothing is good, it's just pain, all day and all night. Pinkie would probably have just collapsed in pain if she had to deal with what I had to. I only got through it because of Dash and nothing else. Seriously, I only did it and only survived it because she cared. I doubt anyone else did. And you know, now that I think of it, I just want to say to you four, Twilight, Rarity, Pinkie & Flutter - I hate you. Thanks for nothing.

--Applejack, May 24th, 2012

i got a million of these

horse rehab must suck

horsie rehab: it's a bigger issue than you might think

it is truly an awful thing!

im just going to do all the ones i have centered around one guy
PART ONE: LET THE FUN BEGIN
GIVE ME A BREAK, PEOPLE

What a joke. People who shall remain nameless actually think that it's funny that this happened to us. Yeah, this, Disclane, the destruction of our town, a hundred-and-thirty-seven deaths. All funny, a comedy, according to...
okay, you know what? I'll just say it, Prince Blueblood is the single most insensitive, immature, small-brained joke of a prince I've ever seen. It's one thing to be a jerk to Rarity at the dumb old gala. It's another thing to think that the deaths of innocents is a joke.

--Twilight Sparkle, April 12th, 2012

I'd just like to say this again in response to Blueblood. You're an insensitive, immature joke of a prince. Stop it - just stop.

--Twilight Sparkle, April 21st, 2012

I REALLY DO NOT LIKE YOU

I never thought I'd say that I want to beat someone up, but I really want to hurt Blueblood again. He's just awful, and he's always saying that Ponyville deserved what it got for being a pleb city or whatever dumb sh... crap he says. I've heard him mock Twilight and Applejack over what they did in the mess and honestly it's just infuriating to everyone. When he spoke to ponies he got jeered and booed all day - and he just got worse and worse. He said that only a few of us didn't deserve what we got and all that, and I just hate him for it. I think I'll go and confront him about it before he goes back to his aristocratic perch in Canterlot and hurls insults behind our back

--Pinkie Pie(!), April 17th, 2012

PART II: COMEDY ENSUES
YOU'RE THE PROBLEM, MAN

Okay, really, I should not have to explain jobs to certain someones. When I say that, I mean this: "You're supposed to be an ambassador of peace, not of pissing everybody off!!", to, you've probably guessed it, Blueblood. I'm surprised he's even still in a position of power, consider how he is, but I guess Celestia needs a guinea pig or something.

--Twilight Sparkle, April 24th, 2012

THE CONTINUING SAGA OF BLUEBLOOD

So today, Blueblood decided he'd come back - again, as if coming back to a city that hates you is a good idea. He really did push everypony's buttons by showing up again, and he had the nerve to imply that it was our fault Ponyville got destroyed. All in a private little meeting between him and us six. It's like he's trying to piss us off!

--Rarity, April 26th, 2012

PART THREE: IN WHICH A BUNCH OF BULLSHIT GOES DOWN
DESERVED

I lost it today, I just couldn't stand to hear that joke of a pony "prince" Blueblood talk about how Ponyvilled deserved what it got and all that. Just, ugh. When I got a chance, I took my hoof and hit him with it. He didn't expect it at all and he got knocked backwards and acted all surprised. I think that he didn't think I'd ever do that - and I wouldn't but he's an awful thing. I told him to get lost after I hit him and he did, I dunno where he went but he told the guards and I guess they don't like me now for my little outburst.
Maybe the gang will understand.

PS: I'm still glad I had that conversation with Blueblood.

"LITTLE DISCUSSION" - ADDENUM TO DESERVED

TS: You know what? I've had it with listening to you, Blueblood. You act like this is all our fault and that we deserve it, but we don't! It was never our fault! RT always blamed it on misfortune and that's all it was! And, you know, I've had enough of you insulting everyone. Not a single one of us deserves what you're saying to us! You always insist that we're all everything you say we are - but we're not and we never will be, and I swear upon Celestia's grave that if you say even a single nasty thing about anyone in this town again, I'll make you sorry you'd ever said it. Got it?
BB: Yes, yeah I get it Twilight.
TS: DO YOU GET IT?!
BB: Yes... yes I do.
TS: That wasn't so hard, now was it? Now get out of here - nobody wants to be around you.

--TS

ONLY AFTER

Life is still going on like it should. I'm glad that Blueblood finally scrammed back to his perch in Canterlot. I suspect he'll have a bit of explaining to do. --Twilight Sparkle, April 28th, 2012
ADDITION
I got some stuff from the guards today. Guess what?

PC: You see why nobody likes you?
BB: Yes...
-------
LATER ON
PC: I seriously do not understand why you think that it's okay to be like this to my subjects.
BB: I don't, princess!
PC: Why do it then?
BB: Well, it does have its perks.
PC: ... Seriously? Seriously?!
BB: You know how I am.
PC: ... I don't even know why I bother.

Apparently, Princess Celestia's not fond of his behavior. I don't know what will come of it though. --TS

the tea is extra tasty to day, maggie.